Self Care…

I'm writing this to try to find some closure in these few months. I was forced to make a decision that I was not ready for and that would affect the quality of my health care. After giving it a lot of thought and talking to the Babes, to Brian at STEP, and having a few disagreements with my health provider, I made the decision to change providers. It was a hard one to make, especially after being with this one for about 8 years. She was someone who I grew to love, respect and consider a friend… then boom, no contact, no more friend, no good-byes or good luck. I found this to be very unsettling, all because I had the strength to empower myself to stand up to what I thought was best for me and the quality of my life, and for that I lost a friend and a care provider. Well, I have a new one now and surprisingly I feel really good about her. My previous provider left me with a lot of fears that I had to face, I had no hope, now I feel like I am being heard and understood and I have some hope not just passing my problems over to the psychotherapist and let me think that I am losing it. I know now, I made the right move toward my health care and making this hard decisions empowered me even more to do for myself, something I never learned until now that I am 47 years old and have been living with this disease for 10 years. My whole life all I knew was to be the caregiver and now I am going to use my life experience of caregiving to others back on myself. WOW.

Poetry

I guess this poem comes from my childhood; I have always loved the fairy tale by Hans Christian Andersen, The Little Mermaid. I had a mermaid piñata for one of my birthday parties as a kid. I have always loved water (being a Scorpio, this is fitting). When I was a little girl, in the bathtub, I would cross my feet pretending that they were my fins. When I used to go swimming in the ocean, or anywhere, I was a mermaid. Yah, think I could ask Oprah to help me become a mermaid for a day? I need to make a costume, just do it. Plus, in the story, the mermaid helps sailors lost at sea find their way back to their ships, or saves them when they are drowning... I have tried to save men for years, but now I am concentrating on just saving myself! I have been doing more artwork lately, and the poem just popped into my head late one night… I would like to share it with you...

I have always wanted to be a mermaid,
The one who swims at sea,
Saving the lost and forlorn ones,
The ones who'll never be.
Oh, to be so beautiful,
so graceful and so free
My only thoughts are of peace and utmost serenity.
To swim with all my friends,
these fish, who want nothing from me?
To play, and frolic, somersault, under this wondrous sea.

-Marcia Hoffman

A Mom's Perspective...

For my daughter, whom I love dearly,

We were shocked and devastated when found out that my daughter and her husband both had it. I told my husband that we aren’t going to lose both of them, are we? He made a gesture and said, we just have to be there for them and pray. I felt we also should talk to them about it (you know how some mothers are). I still worry and cry a lot but I have overcome a lot of that now. I can ask questions and talk about it to my daughter, whereas I couldn’t before.

Then when my son-in-law passed, I was a basket case because I had just lost my husband six months before from a triple bypass surgery. I had a lump in my throat that I couldn’t swallow for the longest time. I loved him so; he was more my son than an in-law. Before going to live in Washington they lived next door to us. He would come and do the chores without asking. My daughter did also, but she was mine. He was just a peach. If I lived near my daughter now I know I would be into a lot of stuff there or even be working in some way to help out. My daughter was part of a study so I got calls from University of Washington Health Center for questions and answers. Sometimes I feel so helpless being so far away and wish I could be nearer to make more of a difference. Whatever happened to my daughter and her husband was God’s will and he will take care of them. I have that faith. She was my first girl and I am proud of her. God will take good care of her and everyone else. I want them to walk with their heads up high and be proud. I say my prayers to everyone, even my enemies (if I have any). We have to say prayers for those who take good care of others, as well as our sincere friends and family. So whether they like it or not, they are being prayed for and loved.
“God Bless All”
Mom

Here's what's new;

For HIV+ Women: A New Way to Learn Every other Monday starting March 8 from 12:00 to 2:00pm at The Northwest Family Center This new program is education, support, childcare and lunch all rolled into one.
It gives you Control: -You decide which classes will be offered. -You decide who the teachers will be. -You decide how many sessions there will be.
It's Convenient: -It starts right after Northwest Family Center's clinic on Mondays. -Childcare is provided. -We'll help arrange transportation.

It's Empowering: -You set the rules. -You can take on a leadership role. It's Useful: -You learn about what's important to you. -Attending classes may help you to get a job or fulfill rehab requirements. -You may even be able to get high school or college credit.
It's Nutritious: -Lunch is provided, and, yes, you get to choose what we eat! How does it work? We will start the planning on February 22 -- BUT DON'T WORRY, YOU CAN STILL GET INVOLVED. The first few Mondays the group will choose topics (anything you want), people to teach the classes (anyone you want), decide how many sessions there will be, and select class leaders; Next, there will be an open house to let other positive women know what will be offered. After all of the classes have taken place, we will have a big graduation celebration. Invite your friends and family to celebrate your accomplishment. How to find out more: Contact Jesse Chipps, Deborah Hudson or Debra Valahu at BABES: 206-720-5566 Contact Kristen Cameron Peace at YouthCare: 206-622-5555 Contact Northwest Family Center for directions: 206-731-3066 Contact Deborah Hudson or Debra Valahu at NWFC on Mondays and Thursdays at 731-2560 OTHER BABES THINGS: March 4: Dawn Averitt (call for details) May 22: Self Advocacy: How can you get your needs met with service providers and what gets in your way. This will be an interactive workshop. At Noon in the BABES office. Thursdays: Every Thursday from Noon to 2pm we have support group at the BABES office.

Marvelous, Mysterious, MAGIC CLOSET!!

Come and look through the wonderful, FREE finds in the BABES’ Magic Closet. We get new stuff in every week (sometimes every day) and the goodies are as diverse as sexy underwear and dog food. Clothes, donated by Venus, are anything from fancy outfits for a night on the town to couch potato wear to nice clothes for job interviews to a sexy little something for that special someone in your life. Here are some things we currently have:

• -Fall weight coats for women and kids
• -Cute skirts
• -Books with no redeeming social value (thrillers and romance novels)
• -Shoes
• -Medi-Sets
• -Science Diet puppy food
• -Flea spray
• -Jeans

Come and get it! Just drop by the BABES office between 10 and 6 on any weekday and rifle through the booty with wild abandon!

SOUND OFF ABOUT HOUSING

Monday March 22, 2pm at the Northwest Family Center

Come give your opinions about the housing needs of women and families with HIV. Representatives from AIDS Housing of Washington will be on hand to hear what you have to say. Your input will help influence how housing money is spent, so it is important that these women hear from as many positive women as possible.

You can tell them about problems you’ve had with housing, as well as your ideas to make housing better. Don’t want to be “out” about your status? There’s no need to give your name. They will listen to everyone’s opinions, and take back the information, but not tie it to any one person. Remember, they want and need to hear everything that’s good and bad about housing from YOUR point of view...so come on down.

We’ll start right after the 12 to 2pm educational group. See you there!

Hey, all you "crafty" BABES!!

Here's something that might be of interest to you. There's an organization called the Craft Emergency Relief Fund (CERF) that offers help to craftspeople who face setbacks to their careers. It offers loans and services for professional craftspeople to return to work as soon as possible after a crisis or an illness. Funding comes from other artists, collectors, businesses, foundations, and the National Endowment for the Arts. One fund is the HIV/AIDS Fund for crafts artists with HIV or AIDS. Some of the benefits include interest-free loans, booth fee waivers at craft shows, discounts on materials and equipment, and assistance with marketing and promotion. CERF hasn't heard from many craftspeople who would qualify for these funds, so they are looking for anyone who would be eligible or interested. If you think this could be for you, or someone you know, here's the way to get more information: call Julie Atkinson at (802) 229-2306, or stop by BABES to pick up an application form.

VOLUNTEER, Anyone?

Attention all BABES and friends! Are you looking for an exciting and fun way to spend some of your extra time? If so, then we would love to talk with you. There are a few events here at BABES every month for which we could really use some help. We'd like to offer childcare to our moms at all events, which are usually on Saturdays or Sundays and some evenings. Flyers and newsletters are printed and we need some helping hands to get them into the mail (fondly known as lick and stick). That will usually happen on a Friday. BABES who drive and can provide rides to and from events are always in high demand. Anyone interested in answering phones and/or doing clerical work, sorting through and maintaining the Magic Closet, and last but certainly not least fundraising, WE WANT YOU! And of course, anyone who has any ideas of things you'd like to do not listed, please call Sue at 720-5566, ext. 13.

CRISTA AIDS OUTREACH

CRISTA AIDS Outreach is a volunteer program to help individuals and families affected by HIV. We provide moving and chore services in the Seattle metropolitan and Everett areas. We also provide groups who want to be involved with families on a long term basis. Please contact your case worker for specifics and scheduling.

Staying COOL?

Anyone need a refrigerator? We have a donation of a refrigerator/freezer, to go to the first caller in need. It's not new, but it works (no fancy icemaker on the door, frost-free feature, etc.). It cannot be picked up until late March… which leads to the next question, anyone with an open-bed truck? Call Laura at 720-5566, ext. 20

Computers, Computers...

Now that some of you may have a computer, you may be asking yourself, what do I do with it? How about getting online? You would need to get a modem and the software that allows you to install it on your computer's hard drive. Modems come in different speeds. About the most basic is a 28.8 k modem - the "k" stands for kilobytes, which refers to its speed. A little faster is a 33.6 k, and faster still is a 56 k. A 56 kilobyte modem should cost about $130.00 according to a price quote from the Computer Store on 45th St. in the U District, 522-0220. Since our computers aren't the latest in up-to-date technology, however, a 33.6 k modem should work just fine. The best deal we found was through a mail order company called Mac Connection. Here's the scoop on how to get one: Mac Connection (800) 800-2222 -Ask for Chris, ext. 8250 -Best Data, 33.6 k. Item #56474 -the price is $49.95, but there's a $20.00 rebate. You have to send in a form to Best Data and they'll send you $20.00 back. -it will come with a modem cable and installation software.

If you just want e-mail, that's easy! But, it's text only and not very exciting... mostly just for writing letters to friends, etc. There are a few free e-mail services, but to get to the Web you would need an ISP (Internet Service Provider). That costs about $20 a month. They're all pretty comparable in price... coming next newsletter there will be a list of services and prices.

Speaking of getting online, check out these FREE INTERNET CLASSES!

Introduction to the Internet: Tuesday, March 2 (1:00 to 5:00pm)

Internet Searching: Tuesday, March 9 (1:00to 5:00pm)

The format will include time for hands-on activities and individual help. Please call the HIV/AIDS Program at 206-296-4649 for more information.

Free Printer: We have a HP Desk Jet printer to give away! Before getting too excited, however, it is being described as old, sad, and tired. But hey, it works! And it's a Hewlett Packard, known for never dying. We will have a lottery to give it away, so send us a note letting us know you want it.

More Free Computer Options… There's a company called FREE PC that is giving away computers for two years as an advertising campaign. They plan to distribute free computers to people who agree to share personal data about themselves and be exposed to Internet advertising. You just have to agree to use it at least 10 hours a month and allow the machine to download advertising that is displayed in a strip on the right side of its screen. If you are interested, call Loren at 720-5566, ext12, and she can fill out a form on-line over the phone with you to get you signed up.

Once again, if you missed out the first time, there are still a few more computers to be given away. Send your note, novel, poem, song (just kidding—we only need a note saying what you will use the computer for) to: Jesse at BABES Network, 1001 Broadway, Suite 100, Seattle, WA 98122 or fax it to 206-720-5901. We will give you the usual cautions: These puppies are not new. They don’t have modems or CD-rom drives, or printers and they definitely do not move at the speed of light. But, hey, they are something! And as always, anyone who wants to send stories about using their computer, or pictures for the newsletter...PLEASE DO! Also, you can send problems (or solutions to problems) you have discovered in to the newsletter, and we will print them to help raise everyone’s knowledge level. Send these to Loren at the above address.

Free HIV/AIDS Acupuncture Clinics

WHERE? 4 - Clinic Locations
WHEN? - 6 days / evenings a week
WHO? - For people with HIV / AIDS in King County Call the clinic of your choice for an appointment.

Why Acupuncture?

The World Health Organization recognizes that acupuncture can treat over 43 common health problems, including many relevant to people living with HIV/AIDS. These include:

• Helping with anxiety or depression, low energy, sexual difficulties, sleep problems, pain, neuropathy, nausea, diarrhea, lack of appetite and other digestive disorders and menstrual problems.
• Helping to reduce AIDS drug side effects.
• Supporting people to manage addictions. ¨ Improving nutrition through dietary counseling.
• Many other general and specific conditions have been successfully treated with acupuncture. So, please let us know what problems you’re experiencing.

Acupuncture is a safe and gentle form of treatment. Most people say that they enjoy it and that it helps them to relax.

At the Clinics

At every clinic you will be seen by the acupuncturist in a private room. He or she will take a medical history and conduct a physical examination (this generally consists of taking your pulse and looking at your tongue. The acupuncturist will recommend treatment which might include the shallow insertion of very thin (hair thickness) disposable needles, acupressure (massage), Chinese herbs or other traditional, noninvasive reatments. Effective non-needle options are available. Appointment time is about one hour.

The Northwest Institute of Acupuncture & Oriental Medicine’s Fremont Clinic (NIAOM):
When: Monday - Friday 8:00 - 5:00 pm, Wed. & Thurs. nights ‘til 9pm, Saturdays 9:00am - 10:00 pm

Where: 1307 N 45th St. , Ste 300 Corner of N 34th & Fremont Ave N in Fremont
Phone: 633-5581

Seattle Gay Clinic:
When: Tuesdays, 6:00 pm- 9:00 pm
Where: 500 19th Ave E, 19th and Republican
Phone: 461-4503

Country Doctor Clinic:
When: Wednesdays, 5:30 pm- 8:30 pm
Where: 500 19th Ave E, 19th and Republican
Phone: 461-4503

Madison Clinic at Harborview:
When: Thursdays, 12:30 pm- 4:30 pm
Where: Harborview Medical Clinic, 2W Clinic, 325 9th Ave
Phone: 731-5100

Kang Wen Clinic:
You’re invited to the Kang-Wen Clinic - Traditional Chinese medicine, HIV/AIDS acupuncture clinic . Treating HIV/AIDS with acupuncture and herbal remedies. Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) excels at the relief of chronic symptoms, including pain, night sweats, nausea, neuropathy, depression, etc. TCM works well with Western medicine and can help with drug therapy side effects. ¨ Walk-ins welcome! ¨ No one is turned away for lack of funds Phone: 206-322-6945 1111 Harvard Ave., Seattle, WA 98122 (SE corner of First Baptist Church) Clinic Hours: Tuesdays 9:00am to 1:30pm Thursdays: 3:30pm to 8:00pm This project funded in part with a grant from the Pride Foundation.

FATIGUE

Tiredness, lack of energy, and fatigue are common problems with HIV+ women. Does it take all of your energy just to get out of bed in the morning? Then somehow you manage to get the kids ready for school, only to find that 10 minutes after they’re out the door that you don’t have enough energy to eat your own breakfast? Well, you’re not alone. Research has shown that the majority of people living with HIV/AIDS suffer from fatigue. Not surprisingly, they also found that fatigue was more common in women than men.

The cause of fatigue Fatigue is not caused by one specific activity, but is the result of several different things. Many times fatigue can be caused by something as simple as too little sleep or having your sleep interrupted sometime during the night. (Do the words “Mommy I’m thirsty” sound familiar?) Depression and anxiety, two things that are quite common for people living with HIV/AIDS, can also cause loss of energy. Research shows that depression and anxiety are more commonly found in women than men.

The cause of fatigue

Fatigue is not caused by one specific activity, but is the result of several different things. Many times fatigue can be caused by something as simple as too little sleep or having your sleep interrupted sometime during the night. (Do the words “Mommy I’m thirsty” sound familiar?) Depression and anxiety, two things that are quite common for people living with HIV/AIDS, can also cause loss of energy. Research shows that depression and anxiety are more commonly found in women than men. Fatigue can also be a side effect of many of the anti-HIV-drugs; some of these drugs can also cause anemia, which can lower your energy level. So, if there are a number of different causes, are there any answers?

Reducing Fatigue

There are a number of things that help.

• Let’s talk about the hard stuff first—putting yourself and your health first. It is very common for women to care for their partner and family before they think of their own health needs. To combat fatigue, you may have to ask someone else for a little help to increase the amount of uninterrupted sleep you get each night. This may mean finding someone to share some of your parenting responsibilities, finding a way to cool down those hot flashes, or letting the cat sleep in another room.
  
  
• See a nutritionist who is experienced with creating diets for people living with HIV and have her do a complete evaluation of your eating habits. If you’re having trouble eating because of nausea, vomiting, or diarrhea let her know—she may have some suggestions. Nutrition and exercise (yes, exercise!) are crucial for maintaining energy and stamina and fighting off fatigue.
  
  
• If you are feeling depressed or “overwhelmed,” see a mental health professional—he also might have some suggestions that can lift your spirits. Again, it is important to ask for help from others, including friends, family, and healthcare professionals.
  
  
• Talk to your doctor about your fatigue and ask her to check your red blood count to determine if you are anemic. If you are anemic, there are a couple of different options you can discuss with your doctor. Some people have blood transfusions; others are given an injection of erythropoetin (Procrit) a couple of times a week.
  
  
• Low levels of testosterone (even in women) can also cause fatigue, so you ask your doctor to check your levels. If you are having horrible side effects from your drug cocktails, let your doctor know. Together you can discuss other possible drug choices or other medications to reduce the side effects.
  
  
• Another option is to see a Doctor of Naturopathy to explore alternative therapies. Many people with HIV have reported having success fighting fatigue by taking the following supplements: yoshimbine, ginseng, DHEA, and carinatine.

So next time you collapse in a heap the second the kids are out the door, remember to take some time for yourself. Pick up the phone and make an appointment with your doctor to discuss your options, and know that it is often necessary to ask others for help. Remember, you will be able to care for your family and friends better if you have more energy, and you can only get that by taking care of yourself.

Anemia and HIV

Sometimes fatigue is caused by not having enough blood cells to carry oxygen to your body. This is called anemia. Since oxygen fuels the fire of your energy level, treating anemia usually helps you have more energy. One way to treat anemia is to convince your body to make more blood cells. A drug called Procrit does just this. If you think you might be anemic, check with your healthcare provider. If they think Protcrit will help you, have them call Janice Price R.N. at Swedish Medical Center (206)-386-2523. Or if you don't have a provider, call Janice yourself. You may qualify for a simple study that will provide you with this drug free of charge.